My Life before America & After
I was born in a nice town called Millstreet, County Cork, Ireland. I was registered at Chatham, Kent, England registrars office on Maidstone Road, Chatham. I was born to a unmarried couple, names are Patricia Tree and Ernie Gulliver. My birth name was Julia Jane Patricia Anne Georgina Gulliver. I
was born at 6am on Thursday 6th February 1969. My older siblings were Peter, Yvonne, Trevor, Michael, Ian, Kieran, Anthony, and my twin Julian. I was a twin and we were not alike in any manner. He later died at the age of seven. I don't remember the complete facts about his death.
I was raised mainly by my grandmother Lillian Gulliver and her second husband Harold. I lived with them for about five years. From the time I was born till I was almost five. My brothers Ian and Julian were also with me while I lived with our grandparents in Chatham, Kent. We were safe and happy. At
the age of five we, Ian and myself were sent to live with our other grandparents Mabel Maud and Ivor Thomas, our grandfather {step-father to our mother} sexually, physically, emotionally abused us while we lived with them. Our mother knew about this but never did anything to stop this
happening.
We all called her Big Nan, as she was bigger in size than our other nan who was Little Nan to us all. Our little nan emigrated to Australia when I was about eight to nine years old. At this time my brother Anthony was at a boarding school in Hythe, Kent. Ian was in the foster care system at the age of eight and his first place was in Lydd, New Romney.
Once Michael and myself were back at the family home in White Road, Chatham, Kent. We were under all under the rule of our mother and now this man she seemed to love and wanted around. He knew about the nature of the abuse Ian and myself had done to us while in Gillingham with our
grandparents. So he took it to heart to continue the abuse to me mainly and also Ian. Peter, Anthony, Kieran, and Michael was old enough to fend for
themselves. Peter moved his girlfriend Kim into the family house. She got pregnant and had a daughter Jackie.
Maurice liked to be called Mole for some weird sort of reason. But he never let me call him this, it was either Master or Sir, but mainly Master. He abused me in many different ways. Sexually, physically, emotionally, verbally. My mother and older brothers did nothing to protect me or help me in any way.
The only time I remember getting help was when Michael or Trevor would try and stop the abuse if it was verbally or physically. But it became too obvious that Maurice was in soul charge of us all if we lived in this big house.
Around this time Michael and myself were sent back to live with my mother and her new man Maurice Riley. he would never allow me to eat with the rest of the family. I would have to wait for the end and would either get the leftovers or be given three to four slices of dry bread and a bottle of water for the day and nothing else. I had to be bathed with either him or one my brothers. This was one of his rules and he would watch and even take photos of this happening. He would always sexually abuse me when my brothers were around to watch. He used to say {you don't deserve to be living, so deal with it you evil devils child} This would always be his words towards me at all times.
We, this body started to going to the local school when I was seven. I would go to school in dirty clothes and with bruises all over my body. The school reported this to the authorities and a social worker would turn up at the house, Maurice would allow me to be put in clean clothes and he would hide the bruises under the clothes. He made sure they never saw his handy work.
Around the age of eleven, I was sent to a boarding school in Margate, Kent. This is where I found my first friend and safety away from him and my mother. While at this school I learn a lot of illegal things from my first best friend Taryn Alexis Murray. She was a year or two older than me, but we
became great friends. Taryn taught me about survival and how to deal with Maurice in a few easy steps. I got addicted to illegal drugs, which helped to blot out the abuse big time. I also learnt how to hack into computers and actually found out all about Taryn and her family. I can't say much, they just
helped me survive to who I am now.
At the age of twelve, I was at home. It was Michael's birthday and our so called parents had gotten him a nice car as he had his driving license and had a good job in the middle of downtown, in the high street. If you are from America, high street is like a built up shopping centre that isn't in a mall, the shops are on a main road, which doesn't allow traffic so people can walk around and shop and eat so to speak. well back to the topic.
The morning was fine, I was allowed a bath without Maurice or anyone watching me. Michael saw to it I had privacy. He did this on a lot of occasions to help me. He would never take photos of me naked or sexually hurt or rape me. But he did let Maurice watch him beat me with sticks and pieces of wood
or brand me with the iron poker for the open fire. He would verbally say things to belittle me or emotionally abuse me like Maurice did. Anyway. After breakfast, Michael was given all his gifts and he loved them all. He looked at my mother and Maurice and told them he was going to take me and himself out for a drive in the new car. Our mother was fuming angry and mad at him and me.
On this drive, Michael drove out of Medway and onto the motorway {Interstate US}. we got to a private area, must have been about 200+ acres of land. It was land owned by James parents. He was Michael's boyfriend. Just our parents never knew this side of Michael. He was different away from the family.
He was a loving older brother to me. Michael, James, Lucas, Louis and Henry were his best friends and we all were having fun on this land. We had races with cars and motorbikes. They had an ATV and I was shown how to drive and I started to have fun for the first time in years. I remembered that
Michael was special and he was my favorite brother. After having a few races on motorbikes and ATVs we had a break and rested to eat. Louis had gone to get a couple of pizza's and some KFC for me. Michael knew I liked chicken and he would always try and sneak me some when we here home.
After the food, Michael decided to try teach me to drive his car. I was tall for my age, which was a blessing in disguise. I got behind the wheel and we started with minor things, like starting the engine and changing gears. He taught me how to signal and then he slowly taught me how to drive and
change gears while driving. I got reverse down and forward was a little trickier but I managed it. we were having races again, but this time I was driving and having a blast with Michael and his friends. There was one problem I didn't drive fast enough for me. So Michael got into the drivers side again and we were racing, this was my best part. I egged Michael to go faster and faster, and he listened to me. Then suddenly the car was turning and turning. I tried to move but was buckled in tight. I tried to get Michael to open his eyes and get us out the car, but he wasn't moving. His friends managed to get me out of the car. I tried to get Michael out, but the car burst into flames and his friends held me back.
When the ambulance and police were called, they took me to the hospital and James met us there. I was in one of the ambulances, Michael was in other one. He died on way from his burns and other injuries. I only had a fractured shoulder blade and elbow. Our parents met us there. all they kept saying was I killed Michael and it was all my doing and I was going to hell for all eternity. {At the time I believed them. But now years later I know it was just an accident}
Once leaving school at the age of fifteen I was pregnant from Maurice raping me. I wasn't allowed to get an abortion, so I gave my child to Taryn to raise as she asked if she could. I agreed. He moved to live with her family in County Cork, Ireland. She named the child Michael in my brother's honor. I was pleased. I wasn't allowed to leave the house till I was eighteen. Taryn and her boyfriend Johnathan {John} moved to live in a house just around the block from me. I was pleased. Their back garden was right opposite ours, I love this. So I would pretend to feed the ducks and pheasants in the garden, which belonged to Peter. He bred them to sell and also he killed a few of them while I watched. I found him very upsetting. I hated the fact he killed these animals he seemed to love so much.
I rescued a baby rabbit, I wanted to keep it, but Maurice said no. he told me it needed killing to feed the family. I ran it over to Taryn and John and they looked after it for me. They ended up with a farm yard so to speak because I rescued cats and a few dogs and some other animals. I was glad when
Maurice and my mother slept, I got help sneaking out of the house from Trevor. He became my next helper and getting and keeping me safe and away from Maurice, just like Michael had.
Trevor, Taryn and John got help from a social worker and solicitor to get me away from my mother and Maurice so he could no long abuse or rape me. I was nineteen by the time I was freed. Trevor had paid the fees to the solicitor and Taryn and John moved me to Ireland so I would be safe. It was great. I was freed at last.
While living in Ireland, I got myself a job and meet guys I dated, but nothing ever lasted. I had many dates and had sex with them. No I never loved them, I thought like Maurice had told me many times growing up. I was just a body for pleasuring men. I got pregnant many times. My first was Kieran, he was born via c section and it was painful. He was diagnosed with autism such a child. I didn't give up I put all my energy into looking after and showing Kieran how much he meant to me and how much I loved him. I had a several miscarriages and lost three children during birth. Most y children died during birth, miscarriage or by the time they were five months old.
I was down trodden and felt lower than low. I wanted to have another child so Kieran had a brother or sister to be with. I had a lovely boyfriend by the name of Carlos Kingstone. I had a son his name I named him Joshua, after my favourite person from the old testament.
When Josh was three, he was taken from me along with Kieran. This was done with help from my mother and Mole. I could do nothing. I could barely read or write. My English wasn't good. I was able to read some words, but my reading level was that of a eleven year old child. I had a job and missed my boys dearly. No matter what, I tried to carry on, never forgetting my two boys. I worked for Jake and his business {no comment} I earned a lot of money to help with my medical bills I had a brain tumor. Tayrn had breast cancer. We both fought to survive together. I moved back to England and living in a large flat. I had two bedrooms and one for me and one for Ian. Maurice and his cronies had found us both. I couldn't prove it but I knew he had something to do with my Grandma Mabel's death.
I rushed over to Medway Maritime Hospital, where Ian had been rushed to hospital. I thought my whole world was over. I found Ian all hooked up on machines. He was barely alive. The doctor called the police and I was arrested for the attempted murder of my own brother. Jake got me a solicitor and I was vanquished. Ian moved back in with me. The police charged Mole with the attempted murder of Ian. He got away with it. I knew Mole was responsible for trying to kill Ian. I got Jake and his friends from the underground to prove that Maurice did this. He told me I was right, so we put the motions in actions to get Maurice put to death. I knew the courts and police wouldn't do anything.
While living at our flat at Maida Road, Chatham, Kent. This is where me, Ian and Gavin lived. Jake, his two boys Paul and Michael. I got a good computer for my work with Jake Murray. I started to learn to read, do basic math and everything I needed to manage a normal life. I began to search so I
could learn about something I'd read in a book from one of the local library archives. Inner-child and B.D.S.M. Inner-child isn't a fetish. I joined a few yahoo role-play groups. I met someone called oldwolf, his real name Albert. This was his yahoo ID on Yahoo Messenger. He and his wife talked for about two years plus role-playing on their yahoo group. This was fun and I made a lot of friends.
This opened the door for me. I started to travel once a year to visit different states and meet friend of mine online. There is someone Taryn introduced me to when I was eighteen, his name online was Troi, but his real name was Joanne. He was a transgendered female to male. The first I'd ever met. My biological father was male to female. But we never got along at all. Taryn knew I was different, that is why she introduced me to this Troi. I got to know Troi and he became my best friend like Taryn was. Later in the year I was diagnosed with my second tumor in the right side of my brain.
But I survived and was in remission yet again. Taryn wasn't so lucky. She was died. It took me a while to get used to the idea of losing my best and first friend I ever had. Jake, Ian and Gavin were there for me while I was with Taryn every day in hospital. It was horrid to slowly watch her die from this horrid illness.
After six grueling months, Taryn was gone and cremated and we scattered her ashes over the Rochester Pier near the Texas home-store. I went home and started to rebuild my life for me Ian and Gavin. Jake would bring his boys so I could watch them grow up. Watching them all grow into such young educated men was wonderful.
In about nine years later, Michael came to me and told me he thought he was transgendered. I know I was and I was attracted to males, making me a gay trans-man. I listened to Michael and was there every step of the way through his counseling and also through the hormones and surgery. He turned into a fine young lady, the daughter Taryn never got to see grow. She wanted me to help her pick a name, as I was her real mother's best friend. We chose Alexis Marie Truelove as her name. I watched her bloom into such a wonderful person.
It was in 2003 I met a girl a M2F girl on a age-play group on yahoo. Her name was Allie. We got to know each other a bit and then she introduced me to Melissa, who is my now life partner. Melissa is a M2F trans-person. Over the next 18 months we spoke on messenger, and on phone. Then in 2005
August, I saved up enough money and decided to go to meet her. By this time Ian was in jail facing life in prison for his crimes. Alexis had a good job and was dating the man of her dreams. I made sure Alexis was loved and looked after by her father Jake. He accepted her as his daughter. It was good to
know Jake still loved his child.
During the next few days and weeks, I prepared myself to leave the country, Jake promised me he would look after Ian, keeping him away from children, just like Gavin did. I got on that flight and went to meet my destiny as Jake watched the plane take off. I arrived at Boston Airport and met Jim
Imbrulgia. He was my friend and buddy. Was with him for two weeks, then I got on a greyhound bus to Indianapolis, Indiana. where I met Melissa and her brother. He was a sweet gentle guy. Melissa's mother and family accepted me as there child, which was nice but I wasn't ready for this. But I decided to try and be who they thought I was.
I married Melissa on 10th November 2005 and I am still married and we are fairly happy together. Neither of us are planning to have a gender change via surgery, well not right now. I do bind my chest, want to wear packers. Yes I am finally the man I should be, well to our online friends, also to a couple church friends too. Melissa's family are very loving, I respect them 100%.
For this story isn't over.. I just starting a new chapter in my life... being the man I should be and loving the woman I never expected to love. We are a happy couple and I wouldn't change a thing about how I wound up here. If I changed anything I wouldn't met Taryn, Troi and Melissa or even had any of the children I had. I keep in contact with Alexis, Paul and Jake on a regularly. Troi died on 24th December 2008. He was a spirit in helping me move to America to be with Melissa.
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